No one ever said that living this life would be easy. At the moment I'm finding it all particularly difficult.
Having created SO much over the last few months, I'm at the moment feeling a bit sorry for myself and despite being permanently inspired to do, make and create, I just can't seem to get it together enough to actually do much of it.
Given my struggle, rather than creating a whole lot of mess and further things for me to do, I'm concentrating on finishing Josie's blanket. I have a ball and a half left to knock out and then it's done. I try very hard to enjoy the process of creating as much as the starting and finishing, but when you're working on a big job like this (each row takes 22 minutes at least), it's the "past half-way but not at the end yet" point that I'm struggling with, the same as my weight loss.
I think at this stage the hunger for the project and the task depletes and it's hardest to get on. I'm really happy with my weight loss so far, and I feel so much better, but I have still got rather a lot to go to achieve what I want and the health benefits that should bring. I guess, thinking about it, I'm at this same point in several ways, the final push is always the hardest.
On Saturday I had to go to Cardiff, much to my dismay. It was match day and it's always chaotic and it didn't disappoint. But it was unavoidable. We have a very important family wedding in two weeks time that we're all looking forward to and Meg needed a new dress. Anyone who knows me knows how I feel about clothes shopping, but, I've always said I wouldn't force my one and only pet teenager to live by my madness. As a result of her not being forced to, she chooses a lot of the time to spend in the same way I do (charity shops first) but she felt it important to have a new dress. So we had to look. And I hated it.
When I walk into a high street shop I can feel my senses being assaulted by the marketing people at every turn and I hate that it makes even me think "I really need that thing". And there were some things that I did want. Of course I didn't buy any of them, but I really wanted them. I can't even remember what they were now, but in that moment, your rational mind does not see that.
So, we picked a plain dress, plain shoes (which were needed anyway) and we have embarked on a treasure hunt to make a fascinator. Something unique, very attractive and hand made. And she's more excited about that than the dress. I think that's what one calls a success. Teenagers are always going to "need" new dresses, it's generally up to you to manage the relationship with those things.
Re-use, recycle, re-create! That's what it's all about.