I've transferred my Mental Health rantings now over to this blog. I can bang on as much as I like over here without mentioning make up!
So today, I stated a page.
I saw this post on my Facebook timeline a few days ago and was spurred into action.
Unacceptable. Makes a mockery of the days of thinking and planning and building up of confidence that I, and I dare say many others, had to go through to make their blog posts and pledges. As a long time sufferer of Mental Health difficulties I resent this.
So I made a page: Remove the Quiz "What is your Mental Disorder?" By I Just Quizzed and it's going really rather well. Why should I have to, though. Is my day off. I should be lying on the sofa watching Dexter.
One of the things that people with Mental Health requirements regularly complain of is the lack of compassion, understanding and empathy from their G.P. I have very many personal experiences of this. One G.P. told me to "take up gardening" one asked me "what do you want me to do about it?" (and not in a "could you advise me as to what you think might help" way!).
I have a friend. Difficult to believe, I know. She's a lovely friend. She was terribly upset today after her trip to the G.P. She is in the process of getting a hold on her situation and doing brilliantly. On waiting lists left, right and centre and doing all the right things to get better and back in control.
When I've been upset like this I find that writing things down is a massive help. I told her she was right to want to complain to the Practice Manager - and to give her the confidence to do it I said that I would format it for her, if she wrote the detail. This is what she wrote:
"My
name is Serena and I am 22 years old. I have recently been diagnosed
with High Functioning Autism, better known as Aspergers Syndrome.
I
struggle with anxiety, panic attacks, depression and I have regular melt downs
which can result in self harming. After that I “shut down”. I don’t want to
talk, eat or move. I don’t want to see anybody and I feel like I can’t leave my
house – it’s hard enough to leave my bed.
I
am currently on sick leave from work because I am not well. What I am, though,
is human; a person. I have feelings.
So
I did not appreciate that when I went to see my Doctor, to renew my
sick note (keeping in mind that he is not the doctor I see regularly about my
Autism – he knows nothing about the battle I have been fighting), he asked me
why I was off work.
The
other time I have discussed my Autism with this Dr. was an unpleasant experience
for me. He told me that “You’re too intelligent to be Autistic”. Now I’m sure
that’s called “discrimination”.
This
time, I explained to him that I am Autistic and
suffering mainly from anxiety, his facial expression said it all. What he said
next confirmed that I was right about what he was thinking. He said “Autism
stops you from working?!?!” I have never been made to feel so embarrassed for
having a disability. I tried explaining how my Autism affected me and made me
feel on a day to day basis, and why that made me unfit for work at this time.
I
didn’t have a chance as he cut me off and said “I think you should go back to
work Autism or no Autism. You’re too young to be on the sick, it will affect
your record in the long term”. He refused to listen to anything I had to say.
At this point I felt totally defeated and could say nothing else. My blood was
boiling, my hands were shaking, my eyes were filling up and my heart pounding.
I had to tell him that I wasn’t prepared to leave without my note. After he reluctantly
handed it over I told him I would not be seeing him again. On my sick note he
wrote “Anxiety – symptoms” which further confirmed to me that he didn’t believe
me.
I
also have Asthma and wanted him to check on my lung function as I have a suspicion
there may be a problem but I felt so humiliated and uncomfortable that I felt
unable to stay in his company any further to have him check my chest.
When
I got home, I had a meltdown. What was supposed to be an appointment with
someone who was there to help me to the best of their ability turned out to be
an appointment with someone who judged me, made me feel like a lazy faker, made
me feel embarrassed and hateful of myself and my disability. He made me feel
like a freak, he made me angry to be the person I am. He hurt my feelings and
for the first time in a long time he made me wish that I was “normal” Are
doctors supposed to make you feel like that?
How
many others have to feel like this before, one day, it breaks someone?
I
am autistic, I am human and I have feelings."
No one has the right to make anyone feel that way. Much less a Doctor. It is wholly unacceptable and frighteningly common.
Why is it that this is allowed? I know that society was very different years ago when a lot of these older G.P.'s were trained and put in post, but still, as a primary care giver they have a responsibility to do the best by their patients.
Many, many times have I come home from seeing a G.P. feeling the way she did. it has a massively negative effect on the way that person feels which can take days and days to start to heal. It makes you feel insignificant, like a terrible waste of air and a freeloader.
Despite being under the care of the First Access Team for my area, my G.P. keeps putting pressure on me to come off my medication! The board of psychiatrists has met with my case worker and agreed that while I'm feeling the benefit there is sense in taking me off them. I could actually go back onto my original "hardcore" medication at any time, if I chose to, but no, my G.P. (who I've spent less than 20 minutes with - ever) still knows best. Yeah, sure.
This needs to be addressed. Mental Health patients are being failed by lots of G.P.s. They are over worked, over pressured and financially restricted. Mental health seems to be taking the brunt.
#timetochange